The last several days I have been on a social media diet. I was attending the World Divination Association’s Virtual Conference and pretty much only looked at updates and comments on those events. It was quite a shock to learn of recent events in the US on Monday evening.
In synopsis, following the death of yet another person of color at the hands of authorities, protests began, followed by riots and looting.
I was torn as to how I should respond or if I even should have a response. Many have said basically, either you are outraged or you are on the wrong side.
The image that kept coming to my mind as I considered what I might say or do was the 7 of Wands. Specifically, the 7 of Wands from the Hearts and Hands Tarot by Liz Blackbird. My desire at its core is to take a stand and rise up. This is what friends and social justice allies are calling everyone to do.
Despite this desire, there are other emotions and circumstances at play not just within myself, but throughout our country. I decided to pull out the cards that I felt represented those concerns to me. The 8, 9 and 10 of Swords.
Many are having an 8 of Swords moment like the one I had initially. People feel like their hands are tied. They are one individual in the midst of a pandemic. They are not sure what is useful or beneficial. They are uncertain how they can do anything. I see this even amongst the most ardent and long serving social justice advocates as we discover events are not always the well-meaning demonstrations by community leaders we wish to be a part of…. several events have been proven to be attempts by agitators to make matters worse.
As the 8 of Swords moment passed, the 9 of Swords moment happened. The panic, tears, sleeplessness. Feelings for friends and family along with frustration over my inability to do anything all flooded my mind. People everywhere are experiencing anxiety for varied reasons on all sides of these events.
And even as some of us struggle through the 8 and 9 of Swords moments, others are having that 10 of Swords experience. Those who are completely overwhelmed, at the end of their rope. They live the moments we are seeing on video, they are behind bars, recovering from the pain inflicted upon them by authorities and citizens alike. And there are those who have spent their lives battling these injustices to see them explode as they did in their youth.
So, how do we get back to 7 from 8, 9 and 10? All I can tell you is what worked for me as much as it has.
Cards are from the Hearts and Hands Tarot by Liz Blackbird
Moving past the helplessness. My own circle has taken to asking one another if they know organizers. Are they local? Are they trustworthy? Are they affiliated with organizations we trust? I have taken queue from my black and brown friends. I have attempted to actively see what they are sharing on social media. These are the things that are important to them and the things they need from the rest of us.
It’s okay to feel! One of the things that living with anxiety has taught me is that you can live with anxiety. Breathe deeply. Acknowledge your feelings. Let them drive you to action. It disturbs you, because you care about other people and your community.
There’s no place to go but up. That 10 of Swords moment isn’t over until we recognize that things can’t get worse. (Don’t test that anymore 2020!) At the end of that moment comes the realization that we are still here and we can keep moving forward.
Working through these cards was how I gained a little clarity for myself. It is not so much that my helplessness and anxiety prevent me from taking action. They are why I need to take action.
